TORONTO GIRL CHRONICLES

I had a lovely non-date date with an old high school buddy yesterday. We chilled over a cup of iced tea and talked about work, life and girls. The girls’ topic is where it gets interesting for me, as I love to get the male perspective on these sorts of things. Carlo is a really great guy, yet single but no girl will mingle… fast forward to a conversation with my girl friends, where it was clearly stated that there is a shortage of good men in the city of Toronto. Is this actually true, or are we just too picky?

I have dated my share of interesting personalities, so I can tell you that it is true, they are out there (the bad boys). At the same time I can also tell I’ve seen my friends fall in love with some good men, so I know they are also out there. I think the problem lies in our perspective. We have all these long lists of things we want in a man, but we need to learn how to differentiate the wants from the needs. You want someone that is 6ft tall, rich and listens to classic rock, and quickly disregard any guy that does not fit the profile. Well those are things that you want. What about the things that you need? Like a man that is thoughtful, supportive, kind, makes you laugh, is hard working (a hard working man will eventually be rich according to my mom) … I could go on. You get the point.

Obviously you need someone that you have crazy chemistry with, but if you give yourself the chance to get to know someone you might be surprised at the chemistry that develops. If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out, but I’ve always believed that good men are worth giving the benefit of the doubt.

Oh! and just a little video to make you smile on a Thursday afternoon….


What are your wants? What are your needs? Am I totally deluded?

Caught your attention didn't I?

What a taboo subject, eh? It seems that we talk about it all the time with our friends, while holding a glass of wine with one hand and covering our giggles with the other one. Yes, we are the "Sex and The City" girls. We sit and chat with our girlfriends about our sex lives, sometimes brag about our hook ups, share tips and all that, but how often do we have real conversations. I mean real conversations about the good, the bad and the scary.  Are we afraid to have these conversations? or are we just too ignorant to have an honest discussion when it comes to sex?


Well the book LAID by Shannon Boodram is just that: an open, raw and completely honest, unapologetic discusion about sex. It talks about everything from random hook ups, to "making love", to wanted/unwanted pregnancy, to rape to aids and everything in between. The stories in LAID force you to sit down and look at your choices and ask yourself questions about what you want your experiences to be like.  At the end of the day, the who, what, where of your sexuality is your decision, but wouldn't you rather know all your choices before you get down and get yours?

LAID, the book, is available at all respectable bookstores, but they had ran out of copies when I went to pick mine up so I bought it at Amazon.

This is the book summarized by Shannon in her own words. Watch:

Luckily, I can not speak from experience since I work in an all girl environment, but what say you about workplace romance?

I was recently looking at pictures from an ex-workplace party, and I couldn't help but notice that many of the happy couples in those pictures, had at one point or another a different kind of relationship. They were client and service provider (get your mind out of the gutter) relationships. Is this a good idea?

According to an article on Business Source.com, 20% of married couples have met at the workplace, so its not like it never happens. Upon further research (read gossiping with girlfriends), I have come to the conclusion that it is risky business. A friend of a friend of a friend had the brilliant idea of hooking up a then boyfriend with a job at her workplace, under her supervision, only to break up with him a couple of months later. To make matters worse, after the break-up she started dating someone that worked at a different department. Can you say uncomfortable?

On the other side, I am sure that an office romance does not have to entail so much drama. I am sure that there are cases that end up happily. Just make sure that you know what you're doing. Make sure that you know your company's policy on inter-office relationships and whatever the case, be discreet (and make sure he is discreet). Don't give 'em something to talk about when it comes to your personal live. Like my mama would say "you didn't bust your ass in school and worked so hard to throw it all away on a whim". (well, she wouldn't really say it like that, sometimes you have to exaggerate to get a point across...)

If you're attracted to a co-worker and he's attracted to you...do you take it forward?  5 things to ponder:

1- Is he cute? I'm just joking...

1- Is he/ she your supervisor? or are your his/her superior?
2-What are the company rules?
3- What are the consequences on your career?
4- Is he trust-worthy? does he like water-cooler chat?
5- What would happen if things end?

Also check out this article from Canadian Lawyer Magazine. It raises some good points.

I once read that if you can not eat it, you shouldn't put it on your face because well, you will end up eating it. After all, your skin is your biggest organ and it absorbes EVERYTHING! So as usual, organic, natural and delicious ingredients are the way to go.

Last Sunday, Lush on Queen Street hosted a Spa Night and I dragged my bestie along for the super indulgent beautifying experience. Lush is the place to go in Toronto for all natural, organic, hand made cosmetics.  They carry everything from shampoo bars (no packaging = good for the environment) to foot scrubs (who doesn't love cute feet?) and while their prices are a bit higher end, if you're going to invest in something, invest in your health (beauty = health).

Also their staff is hilarious! they absolutely know every single product, so if you have any questions don't be shy and ask, they will even throw in a story or two about how they found an alternate use for the product (more bang for your buck) all the while relating it to an episode from Sex and the City.

We each had to pick a treatment, so Soraya got a luxurious facial. Being the hard-working, crazy-busy girl that she is, she needed something that would refresh her face and give her that "I-just-woke-up-from-a-long-sleep-glow". 


 Myself, I am always running from one place to the other and I figured that my feet needed a little pampering. Especially after long months of captivity inside my winter boots, so I indulged in a foot scrub. I soaked my feet in warm water spiced up with a Bath Bomb, and then I experienced heaven via a handsome man (thanks Craig!) massaging my feet with a cooling minty foot scrub called Fair Trade Foot Scrub containing spearmint, peppermint and cocoa butter. Finally my feet were softened with a Therapy Massage Bar.

My bf always plays this song when we are in the car and I dance to it, he thinks its cute. The video just came out. It's such a catchy song, it smells like friday night.

"Do you like it well done, cause I do it well?"
"Can you take my order cause your body is like carry out?"
"Take my order, no errors, I'ma (sic?) touch you in all the right areas"

Makes me smile. Ahh...I love this song.

I remember when I was a teenager and my mother and grandmother would take me bra shopping. I hated it. My grandmother, who doesn’t speak a word of English, would start asking the sales lady all these questions and she would come in the change room and start adjusting straps and turning me around making sure everything fit. It was mortifying. Bra shopping was a dreaded experience. Really, why would you care about something no one but you can see? Well, in adulthood, my dance teacher sat me down one day to talk about the importance of having a proper fitting brassiere. I got the hint. She directed me to Tryst, where I got my first adult fitting and invested in a proper bra.

It really does make a huge difference, which got me thinking, if I didn’t know about this, there must be other girls that don’t know about it too. Well I’m not far off: 80% of women wear the wrong size. I had a little Q&A with Shana @ Tryst and this is what I learned:

What are the basic bras that every girl should have?
A dark bra, black if you want but it isn't necessary, to wear under dark clothing, a nude bra (close to your own skin colour or darker) to wear under white or light clothing, a strapless or convertible bra to wear with special clothing and a sports bra is great to give support while working out.

Why is it important to have a bra fitting?
A professional bra fitting will not only ensure that you find the perfect size for you but also that the shape is perfect shape for you as well. Every time you buy bras you should get fitted again, even if you haven't changed, the bras on the market may have and they will all fit you differently. A professional bra fitter will know how all the new stock fits so it will also cut down on wasted time of you trying on things that are not appropriate for you.

How do you know a bra doesn't fit properly?
The number one sign is you are uncomfortable and or your breasts don't look good. However there are many other signs such as the back of your bra riding up. The bottom of the back of the bra should be level with the bottom of the front of the bra. If the back is higher then the front you are wearing a back too big and your breast are not as lifted as they could be. You breasts spilling out the top bottom or side of the bra is an obvious sign that the cup is too small. The wire pulling away from the body at the bottom of the bra also means that it is too small. If there is wrinkling in the cup this is also a sign that there is something wrong with the fit but it doesn't necessarily mean that the cup is too big.


Can you give me some care-taking tips for your bras?
Hand washing is best, but if that is not a possibility, washing in the machine on a gentle cycle in cool water will suffice. A garment bag for your bras or other delicates will help keep the wires from getting mangled and the hooks from catching on other garments. Bras need frequent washing, usually after every use, as body oils, lotions and deodorants all contribute to the breaking down of the Lycra/elastic in the band of the bra. Since the support from a bra comes mostly from its back, keeping the back from stretching prematurely will extend the life of your purchase.

And why would you care about something that no one but you can see? Because you should love yourself, you should pamper yourself, you should make yourself feel sexy for no one but yourself. It’s the fun part of being a girl, Why would you deny yourself that treat?

P.S – Shana has generously offered 10% discount to anyone that mentions this
blog. But only for the month of February…just in time for a Sexy Valentines
Day!